Pie-ku

Roll out the jolly
It's all about the cookies
Well earned Pie-atus

Pie Anxiety
When you wake to find your dream
Is reality

Not in a good way
The cinnamon scented broom
Takes my breath away

Pie-oh-neer Women
Unafraid of Thanksgiving
Keep rolling along

You say potato
I say yam and bourbon and
Brittle on the side

One for the Baker
Is why a Baker's Dozen
Is thirteen not twelve

Beware the sharp knife
When prepping quinces for pie
Espresso can wait

I just can't help it
Gluten free mini cupcakes
Make me plum crazy

The long, winding road
Leads to chocolate walnut
When pears are not ripe

The apple cake sticks
In the non-stick Bundt pan try
Apple pie instead

And when the rains came
Commercial plastic wrap saved
The pies from drowning

How do you keep her
In New Jersey now that she's
Seen Rensselaerville?

Jell-O and Cool Whip
Cozy in a pie shell but
Nellie and Joe win

A pie tour you say?
Where is Ellen to play judge?
Unavailable

Can I have a job?
Cover letter, Resume
It's Boston Cream PIE?

Gone to read and write
See you in September, please
Turn off the oven

Hey! It's your birthday
But you ate all the peaches
Sigh... No pie for you

He says I'm kneady
I thought we were just peachy
Truth is, he's flaky

My Cherry amour
Pretty little pie that I
Adore a la mode

On July the 4th
Proclaim your pie dependence
Red, white, blueberry

Fresh raspberry pie?
Swedish Chef nods bork! bork! bork!
And serves Snozzberry

Lattice be pie pals
Cherry said to apricot
Won't crimp your style

Don't say I never
Baked you your very own pie
Happy Father's Day

Elbow meets oven
Hip meets corner of table
Baker black and blue

Smoke gets in your eyes
When you think the pie plate is
Deep dish but it's not

Uncork the champagne 
Slice up the strawberry tart
No more tuition

Graduation Pie
Two parts pineapple one cream
Magna Rum Laude

No breakfast in bed
Baking pies all the day long
Where's my Mimosa?

What'll it be Pal?
cinco de Mayo Pie-oh
And a whipped cream shot

Guilty cried the Judge
What is my crime, Your Honor?
No pie for the Judge

Rhubarb is not fruit
It's a vegetable that stained
My new white shirt red

No pie on Pesach
Coconut macaroons will
Rise above the rest

Here comes cherry pie
There goes the white tablecloth
Where is the stain stick?

Mr. Oven Man
Thank you Three fifty is now
Really Three fifty

Challenging road trip
Poor tire flat as pie dough
Pass me the 'donut'

Could not did not sleep
Now it's half past dark thirty
Time to make the pies

Three point one four day
Is just around the corner
Pre-heat your oven

Mile High Pie, Sigh
Wish I were in New Orleans
It's not snowing there

Non-stick cooking spray
I loathe thee You're slippery
Whoops drop whoops drop whoops

Snowmageddon falls
I will shovel then eat pie
And curse the Groundhog 

Distracted baker
Add the powder, soda, salt
Wait. Didn't I just...?

Pizza pie perches
On the roof of my car for
Just a second, whoops...


He says I'm kneady
I thought we were just peachy
Truth is, he's flaky

My Cherry amour
Pretty little pie that I
Adore a la mode

On July the 4th
Proclaim your pie dependence
Red, white, blueberry

Fresh raspberry pie?
Swedish Chef nods bork! bork! bork!
And serves Snozzberry

Lattice be pie pals
Cherry said to apricot
Won't crimp your style

Don't say I never
Baked you your very own pie
Happy Father's Day

Elbow meets oven
Hip meets corner of table
Baker black and blue

Smoke gets in your eyes
When you think the pie plate is
Deep dish but it's not

Uncork the champagne 
Slice up the strawberry tart
No more tuition

Graduation Pie
Two parts pineapple one cream
Magna Rum Laude

No breakfast in bed
Baking pies all the day long
Where's my Mimosa?

What'll it be Pal?
cinco de Mayo Pie-oh
And a whipped cream shot

Guilty cried the Judge
What is my crime, Your Honor?
No pie for the Judge

Rhubarb is not fruit
It's a vegetable that stained
My new white shirt red

No pie on Pesach
Coconut macaroons will
Rise above the rest

Here comes cherry pie
There goes the white tablecloth
Where is the stain stick?

Mr. Oven Man
Thank you Three fifty is now
Really Three fifty

Challenging road trip
Poor tire flat as pie dough
Pass me the 'donut'

Could not did not sleep
Now it's half past dark thirty
Time to make the pies

Three point one four day
Is just around the corner
Pre-heat your oven

Mile High Pie, Sigh
Wish I were in New Orleans
It's not snowing there

Non-stick cooking spray
I loathe thee You're slippery
Whoops drop whoops drop whoops

Snowmageddon falls
I will shovel then eat pie
And curse the Groundhog 

Distracted baker
Add the powder, soda, salt
Wait. Didn't I just...?

Pizza pie perches
On the roof of my car for
Just a second, whoops...

Apple Cinnamon
Kindred to pie and strudel
Bagels? Not so much

Grapefruit seeks pie shell
Meringue loves only lemon
Grapefruit sits alone

Holidays be still
My rolling pin is weary
January.  Sigh

Why do I forget
The left-handed oven mitt
It has a hole. Ouch